Share Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Pinterest Bluesky Threads “The horror… the horror…” by TurkeyVolumeGuesser
swazal on November 5, 2025 12:38 am If only he were military, he’d be up for a Purple Heart. Or a promotion to Colonel Mustard.
T1Pimp on November 5, 2025 1:03 am Could have sworn I’ve seen them all decked out. Was this one not wearing his sammich proof vest and mask?
Ja_Shi on November 5, 2025 1:03 am SNAP recipient flung his final drops of Grey Poupon at the Border Patrol agent as a statement. ^(Fuck French’s classic yellow mustard)
jonsnowsbattlebun on November 5, 2025 1:07 am Now that nobody’s getting paid he should appreciated getting a free sandwich
mezawoodndyes on November 5, 2025 2:04 am Legend has it, that it was a knuckle sandwich delivered by a grand mustard of tae kwon dough, therefore being an assault with a deli weapon.
zenos_dog on November 5, 2025 3:56 am I smelled mustard…. in the air like a gas…. it was mustard gas.
Mulliganasty on November 5, 2025 4:51 am His full testimony sounds delicious!! 10/10 would smash that sammie.
25 Comments
Trump will probably give him the Purple Heart.
If only he were military, he’d be up for a Purple Heart. Or a promotion to Colonel Mustard.

Could have sworn I’ve seen them all decked out. Was this one not wearing his sammich proof vest and mask?
SNAP recipient flung his final drops of Grey Poupon at the Border Patrol agent as a statement.
^(Fuck French’s classic yellow mustard)
Now that nobody’s getting paid he should appreciated getting a free sandwich
Imagine being a Nazi and a snowflake at the same time.

PastramiTSD
What a snowflake.
Post Traumatic Sandwich Disorder
It was his vietnam
Oh, boo hoo. 🙄 “Waaaa! That guy hit me with a sandwich! 😩”
medic… MEDIC!!!
Snowflake!!!¡
Mustard? God damn mustard.
Legend has it, that it was a knuckle sandwich delivered by a grand mustard of tae kwon dough, therefore being an assault with a deli weapon.
These guys are such pansies.
Sandwich snowflake.
“I done did fear for ma life yall!!!”
It didn’t explode, on cross the defense made him admit it 😂
“Subs. Subs never change”
I smelled mustard…. in the air like a gas…. it was mustard gas.
Do you get a Purple Heart for an “exploded sandwich”??
His full testimony sounds delicious!! 10/10 would smash that sammie.