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    I came across this book in a Deli in Manhattan (OC)

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    32 Comments

    9. tigerjuice888 on

      I think id enjoy reading a poem he actually wrote. No way it wouldn’t be hilarious

    11. Dork_Island on

      Page 2: “Roses are red, their stems are green. Don’t even talk to me if you’ve over thirteen”. Thank you for your attention to this poem. -DJT

    17. Dr_Rjinswand on

      Oh freddled gruntbuggly,

      Thy micturations are to me, (with big yawning)

      As plurdled gabbleblotchits,

      On a lurgid bee,

      That mordiously hath blurted out,

      Its earted jurtles, grumbling

      Into a rancid festering confectious organ squealer.

      [drowned out by moaning and screaming]

      Now the jurpling slayjid agrocrustles,

      Are slurping hagrilly up the axlegrurts,

      And living glupules frart and stipulate,

      Like jowling meated liverslime,

      Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes,

      And hooptiously drangle me,

      With crinkly bindlewurdles.

      Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,

      See if I don’t!

    21. Smell_the_funk on

      I have words

      The best words

      Some even say

      they have never seen

      a single man

      with that many words

      I have words

    22. MajorBeyond on

      Like Vogon poetry. Makes you writhe uncontrollably in agony. Then you have to say how much you liked it.

    23. Automatic-Turnip8144 on

      Tiny Hands. Walnut Brain.
      Cruel Sadistic Diaper Stain.
      Epstein Paedo. Lizard Eyes.
      The world waits for him to die.

    25. _Ronin_Raccoon_ on

      Got this for my maga dad as a gag gift because it’s just all his stupid and unhinged rants from debates and tweets.

      My dad did not get the joke (or notice the tiny hands)

    27. guestpassonly on

      *Roses are red*

      *Violets are blue*

      *Epstein and i*

      *We were like glue*

    28. robidaan on

      Poetry by DJT

      1. “I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn’t lose any voters.”
      — Campaign rally, 2016 (New York primary era)

      2. “Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything.”
      — 2005 Access Hollywood recording (published 2016)

      3. “I know words. I have the best words.”
      — Various campaign remarks, 2015–2016

      4. “Nobody knows more about taxes than I do.”
      — Repeated campaign statement, 2015–2016

      5. “I have a great relationship with the blacks.”
      — Interview comment, 2011 (widely criticized for phrasing)

      6. “What the hell do you have to lose?”
      — Addressing Black voters during 2016 campaign speeches

      7. “It’s freezing and snowing in New York — we need global warming!”
      — Tweet, 2013 (widely circulated)

      8. “The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make U.S. manufacturing non-competitive.”
      — Tweet, 2012

      9. “Covfefe.”
      — Incomplete tweet, May 2017 (deleted shortly after posting)

      10. “I’m the least racist person you’ve ever met.”
      — Multiple campaign and press statements, 2016–2020

    29. calgeorge on

      “A lot of people are saying it’s the best poetry they’ve ever read. I don’t know. They say that. They say, sir, you have such a way with words. And I do. Did you know poetry doesn’t have to rhyme? A lot of people don’t know that. They say it has to rhyme. I don’t know.”

    32. Sonicmantis on

      I moved on her very heavily
      in fact I took her out furniture shopping
      She wanted to get some furniture
      I said I’ll show you where they have some nice furniture
      I moved on her like a bitch.
      couldn’t get there and she was married
      Then all-of-a-sudden I see her
      she’s now got the big phony tits and everything
      She’s totally changed her look.
      …
      Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything.

      -Donald Trump

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