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    [OC] In 1385, a Portuguese baker named Brites de Almeida killed 7 invading soldiers with her wooden bread shovel after finding them hiding inside her oven. She is a national legend.


    [OC] In 1385, a Portuguese baker named Brites de Almeida killed 7 invading soldiers with her wooden bread shovel after finding them hiding inside her oven. She is a national legend.

    by Soft-Loquat-3008

    View 34 Comments

    34 Comments

    1. Soft-Loquat-3008 on

      Brites was famous for her incredible strength and for having six fingers on each hand. After the battle was over, she returned home to bake bread, only to find the soldiers hiding in her oven. Instead of running for help, she handled them one by one with her shovel. Her legendary shovel is still preserved in a museum in Aljubarrota today! 💪🇵🇹

    10. NUMBerONEisFIRST on

      I’m thinking it was a few men, and she had 5 fingers on each hand.

      Doesn’t make her any less badass either way.

    11. asslickingcheekseekr on

      Bots have taken over reddit. I just saw a comment about this under a post about the war preceding this incident. Seems like it’s time to leave reddit

    13. zbambo on

      After their defeat in the Battle of Aljubarrota, 7 or 8 of the Castilian soldiers found shelter at Brites’ bakery, which was empty because she had gone out to help kill the fleeing soldiers. On her return she found the door closed and suspected the presence of enemies. She found the men hiding in her baker’s oven and killed all of them with a shovel. She then cooked them in the oven along with the bread. Yummy.

    15. Soft-Loquat-3008 on

      If you enjoyed this absolute legend of a baker, make sure to follow my profile! I’ll be posting many more epic and ‘badass’ stories from Portuguese history that you’ve probably never heard of. There’s a lot more where this came from! 🥖⚔️🇵🇹

    17. KURDISHMINOR on

      iirc this is not true, those castilians raped and killed her but portuguese had to create some kind of jeanne d’arc to build national identity

    18. Crusty-Dick on

      I’m just imagining one soldier coming out from the oven one at a time, while she smashes their head in.

    19. Dunderman35 on

      How do you kill 7 men with a wooden shovel? Were they just lying there letting themselves be battered to death one by one?

      This story needs a fact check.

    20. NameLips on

      I just fell down a wiki-hole reading about that war! Somebody posted a meme about 6000 Portuguese defeating 30,000 Castilians and that’s how I ended up there. Did you do the same thing?

    26. Old_Resident8050 on

      That wasn’t a common shovel. It was actually a Legendary quality Shovel, plus sharpened and the baker had drunk various +5 potions buffing her STR, WP and ENDURANCE.

      Ofcourse she made short work of the fodder.

    27. 6feetandpenistall on

      It had to be enchanted. I don’t see any other way. A wooden shovel does just 2.5 damage.

    30. sweetsuffrinjasus on

      This has been going on with mothers for generations. Her weapon of choice was a bread shovel, which admittedly is novel, but be it a slipper, sandal, wooden spoon, brush handle, handbag, or the snap of a towel, it’s a skill that is there for generations.

      The towel tucked into the apron was for the pros. It was a swiss army knife. From opening jars, wiping down surfaces, all the way to snapping the back of your legs if you stepped out of line.

    32. senseiman on

      “Beaten to death inside an oven by a Portugese baker using a shovel” is definitely not how I want to go.

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