We simply ask for applicants to submit their resume when they apply for our delivery driver position. This guy emailed saying “I’m interested and experienced!”. He then called to follow up and we asked him to please send a resume. He hung up and sent this instead. Truly made my day.
by Nonatheman
37 Comments
Hahaha this is the funniest shit I have ever read in my life
Why do you need a resume when all the info you need is on the application?
Thank god he’s not applying for a proofreading job.
I have a feeling this is here because someone finally said the truth and you got hurt. What you are paying per hour and what’s the job?
Resume? More like a short novel 😂
Bro isn’t wrong though. Job market is frustrating right now. They could write more intelligently to convey the point, but… this crap sucks.
bro. RELAX
You’re hired!
The ‘you sound like you never seen a gym in your life bro’ really came out of nowhere. 😂😂 What an asshat!
Heh, least this was in a message. I interviewed some pretty spectacular individuals over the seventeen years I owned a comic and game shop.
One guy had a five-minute monologue where he argued with himself over whether he should “file books” or “talk to customers” when asked which was a better use of his time when about to close. Another young lady asked the same question answered, “I finish filing, and shoo them out!” with a double hand wave. Pause… “That was the wrong answer, wasn’t it?” At least it was her first interview ever.
Best resume I got was from a woman who hand wrote the entire thing. It looked like it was a printed handwritten font, but it wasn’t. Nearly perfect. I interviewed her just to see what kind of person does that. Someone on drugs with some mental issues I believe…
Closest I had to your applicant was a kid who complained about everything we did for a solid fifteen minutes and then asked for a job.
I miss the stories, though I don’t envy you. Managing folks is a trip.
that shit reads like a reddit comment
This is the type of guy who argues with himself in the mirror
BRO RELAX, IM SO EMPLOYED THEY CANCEL EACH OTHER OUT. WHEN A MILLION DOLLARS GETS A JOB IT GETS PAID IN ME’S M’FCKR!!!
You want my resume? Do you *even* lift bro?
Ok Ignatius Riley..
Sir, this is literally a Wendy’s
Years ago I worked in retail and a semi-drunk guy came in and asked if we had any jobs available. The manager spoke to him and at the end asked him to leave his name and phone number and the guy went ballistic and started yelling, “Why do you need my phone number?!? THAT’S MY PRIVATE INFORMATION!! You don’t need that!!’ And a fight almost broke out before we got him to leave.
Just wait till he gets asked to do a stupid personality questionnaire and one of those dumb video responses to questions. I really really really hate job hunting these days.
Writing a resume is a basic professional skill that everyone should have. I think it’s a great tool to filter the riff raff out.
I wonder what kind of environment a person like this was raised in to think they are doing anything aside from making a complete fool of themself.
I was like “oh boy, this guy doesnt use a single dott or comma”, but then he MASSIVELY overcompensated (or saved them up?) later, which made it even worse.
I want to make a period joke. But it seems a little obvious
“I make more money than you right now and I don’t even have a job yet”
That’s hilarious
Just methin around!
This is giving, “I write drunk even when I’m sober” vibes.
I had a manager once tell me a guy came in asking for a job application with a hat on that said “fuck you”,
When’s he starting?
How is this funny?
i genuinely think this guy is that Wes Watson idiot lol this read exactly like his interrogation
Maybe with how much he gets paid, he can buy himself an education and manners.
It just devolves and devolves and devolves
Sir, this is a Wendy’s.
Is he a French dancer?
Let me guess, that was JD Vance that sent you that, right? 😝
Wow he is over qualified for a position as flower delivery driver. I wonder if there are people who are not lol
Honestly, he’s got a point.
Chumps send a resumé.
This hot dawg sent you a resumę.