While training my models on a 142 label taxonomy for the grey mirror I noticed that in all the training data whether it was couples who broke up or stayed together. One thing always stays the same and that’s the “x” shaped pattern on this chart. Because everything is new and fun when your in the honey moon phase but flirting and intimacy always drops and conflict and pressure always rises. The successful relationships I’ve noticed always have a way longer time period usually 2-5 years before their chart lines for intimacy/conflict converges to form the X. All the ones that converged sooner. Always doomed. lol so in conclusion the longer the honeymoon phase. The better off you are.
Fun fact: the shape of what I call the “X” chart Varies wildly and some stay parallel for a while some make a w or an m before converging and thats why the training is so imperative my models have seen so many of these charts that they can correlate which attachment styles (usually) each person is by the shape of their X chart and that allowed me to lighten the GPU load and get rid of the “attachment style analyzer model” to lighten the load on my server
To improve the model and stress-test the analysis engine, I’m looking for voluntary contributors willing to share long-term message histories (for example multi-year conversations with a partner or spouse). These datasets are extremely difficult to obtain ethically, so I am only requesting explicit opt-in contributions.
Important details up front:
• Opt-in only. I will only analyze conversations voluntarily submitted by the person who owns the message archive.
• No scraping or harvesting. Nothing is collected without explicit permission.
• Anonymization. Names, phone numbers, addresses, and other identifiers are removed before analysis.
• Contributor control. You can request deletion of your data from the dataset at any time.
• Your responsibility. Only submit conversations you have the legal right to share. Please do not submit anything involving minors or sensitive third-party information.
• Purpose. The dataset is used to train and test a relationship-analysis system. This is commercial software development, but insights may also contribute to future publications on communication patterns.
What contributors receive in return:
• A free full Grey Mirror relationship report generated from your message history.
• A visual map of the communication dynamics across the entire relationship timeline.
• Pattern detection showing things like emotional drift, conflict cycles, reconciliation phases, and communication asymmetries.
• If you want it, I can also provide the fully anonymized version of your dataset after processing.
What I’m specifically looking for:
• Long-term conversations (ideally 1–10+ years)
• High message volume (thousands of messages or more)
• Romantic relationships, marriages, or long-term partnerships
If you’re interested, send me a DM and I can explain the export process and show how the anonymization works before you share anything.
If this isn’t something you’re comfortable with, that’s completely fine. I’m only looking for people who explicitly want to participate.
by All-in_loveandwar