I Was Only 19

    by Line_boy

    36 Comments

    1. It was my experience that finding space, was more about finding “my space”.

      This story was based on a girl that I never met again after a party 20 years ago but the time we shared still lives in a happy place in my brain to this day.

    2. In my twenties, I always thought there’s no better ambiance than the smoking area outside a nightclub. I never smoked, just went out to chat with randos.

    3. ScytheOfAsgard on

      I remember when I was in high school a certain authority figure saying do you want to live life on the sidelines and I said yes and they were not prepared at all for that response and they were like well that’s exactly what’s gonna happen if you ((I forget the part they were trying to change)) lol

    4. BrightNeonGirl on

      This is the same plot to the music video for “The Middle” by Jimmy Eat World 🙂

    5. fuck_this_i_got_shit on

      My teenage son still snuggles with me when burnt out after about 30 minutes of too much socialization.

    6. My aunt and I will tuck ourselves away in a separate room to decompress from family socializing during gatherings.

      Edit: TO SCROLL ON OUR PHONES. OR READ.

    7. Is it just me or does this feel like that one beach scene in eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

    8. We all need to figure out our own ways and the best path for us, very simple but also very difficult at times.

    9. I wound up outside a lot. As a result though, I associate the smell of cigarettes with friends.

    10. coconut_crusader on

      Man, not sure if intentional or not, but “I was only 19” has a totally different meaning here.

    11. This is essentially how my wife and I got together.

      Big house party, I’m a huge extrovert and there were plenty of nose clams to go around (iykyk) so I was having a grand old time but she’s incredibly introverted and was being crept on by pretty much every dude there. She and I had worked together in the past but only interacted a few times and I was outside smoking a cigarette and we saw each other and…it’s been over three years now and we’re pretty much attached at the hip.

    12. I mean, they’re the only one who wore a traffic cone to the party; of course they feel out of place.

    13. The nostalgia of discovering “maybe the fringe is my scene” hits hard / deep. Thanks for sharing OP.

    14. me_on_the_internet on

      My problem is I would also have no idea what to say to a person who sits down next to me, so this would be literally the complete story

    15. I initially read “Maybe the fringe is my scene” as “Maybe the *fridge* is my scene” and I’m like, “Same.”

    16. THEFLYINGSCOTSMAN415 on

      This was/is my life. It’s perfectly fine once you accept it, no need to try to be something you don’t enjoy

    17. Man last time I went to a bar for a local concert, I was enjoying the music but people kept crowding my little table so I went outside to get some space. Some guy came out and accused me of trying to roofy some girl or something? Idk he seemed drunk AF and was slurring real bad but a bunch of people were coming out and glaring at me so I got uncomfortable and left.

      To be clear, I have never ever felt any desire to do anything that awful, idk why he came out and started yelling at me. I just wanted to have a few minutes without being surrounded by drunk, smelly people. Haven’t gone back to that bar since, it used to be where I tried to kinda open up and be more social and extroverted.

      I did end up finding a group to play Magic and go to escape rooms and stuff through work though, so I think bars just weren’t my vibe.

    18. Damn. Maybe the fringe was my scene. I guess I never considered that a possibility. Just always thought I was a loser.

    19. Theavenger2378 on

      I used to live near a nightclub. I would go, have a few drinks, stand near the bar or outside with the smokers (I don’t smoke but enjoyed the chill atmosphere with those that did).

      A few people thought it was strange that I wasn’t trying to dance with everyone/anyone. But I found the rhythm that I enjoyed.

      Then the manager of the place ran off with 3 grand owed to the property owner and the place shut down. Ah well.

    20. The walls of childhood melt slowly and unevenly. Take your time, the way is the melting, into someone, away from others, chilling with new friends.

    21. In my partying days I found that once you start owning the fringe, it begins to turn into a role; every house party I went to with my friends, I would find a group of other pot smokers and establish the “smoking corner”. People got used to the fact that we’d always be there and would come looking for us when they needed somewhere quieter or wanted to partake. It was nice.

    22. One of my favorite “feelings” is from my party days in my teens-twenties. When it would be some sort of house party, and it’s hot as hell and loud and crowded inside, and you take a minute to go outside for a breather with a few people, specifically in the winter. Maybe have a cigarette (I don’t smoke but I’ve indulged..) and get that crisp winter air, dark sky, muffled music from in the house, and stay out there and have a little chat until you get cold and head back in. I’m 32 but relived this feeling a couple weeks ago on a ski trip with a few people. Wood stove was cranking inside and we stepped out for a quick minute in -9 F weather. Made me feel alive

    23. Apprehensive_End1039 on

      Shoutout to all the porch dwellers of the world. That liminal, intimate space on the edge of the scene.

      Don’t even smoke anymore, but will hang out there for hours just to have quiet, serious conversations with strangers.

    24. Accidentally a comic about how modern building design has led to a decline in ventilation/IAQ

    25. When I was a kid I got invited to a Chuck E. Cheese birthday party. At some point I got overwhelmed or something(can’t quite remember why) and snuck into the tube maze thing they had indoor and just kind of sat there and chilled. This girl who wasn’t part of the party I was attending noticed me and struck up a conversation as she invited me to play. I had a feeling she thought I was cool or something because she kept asking me questions about myself and just random things, I remember answering as best as I could as a kid. Anyways I had to leave and I told her bye and I’ve probably never seen her again but that memory has stuck with me for years. I sometimes wonder if she’s doing well or if she even remembers me.

    26. I spent about an hour at a party, got annoyed with a group of people there, went outside and climbed a tree. Bout ten minutes later I was no longer alone in the tree.

      If you’re just openly weird, people will show their weird, too.

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